My Tukker Bear's Birthday

Today at 3:11 pm my sweet baby girl had been in this world for two years. It has been a crazy two years that has both flown by and crept slowly along with ever lasting moments. I remember when she was born I had no idea how to feel. My mom promised me that if I waited to give birth until she got home from West Virginia that she would do the hard part for me. When it came down to the last moment I remembered that even though I had waited for my mommy I was still going to have to do this myself. I was scared to death. It was a seven hour labor that felt like a hundred years. Not because it was hard or stressful or even all that painful. It lasted forever because as badly as I wanted my body back I also wanted my baby to stay inside where she would be safe and warm and I could have her all to myself. The moment finally arrived where I saw her beautiful fat little face...I felt like I was frozen in time. I was laughing and kinda crying. I remember my mom taking my hands and putting them on my babies skin. She was saying, "feel her Heather. Feel how warm she is. She is all yours." I felt scared to touch her for some reason. It didn't seem real. As soon as I snapped out of it and the world begun to spin again I couldn't stop kissing her and holding her tight to me. She was so smooth and had beautiful olive skin, she was warm and smelled good and she loved me and I loved her. More than anything :) For that first year she wasn't my baby she was my best friend and my side kick. At times I felt like she was all I had and at times I enjoyed sharing everything I had with her. She would cry and scream ALL THE TIME and I still wanted to smile even when I wanted to cry. After she got through her screaming phase she became the smiley baby that every one loved. She is gorgeous and funny and full of character. I can't believe she is two now. The second year of her life went much faster than the first and now she is entering her terrible twos! But when she is not having a meltdown, she is funny and so smart and a blast to just be with...and an awesome big sister to her baby that she loves almost to much. Here are some of my favorite pics over the last two amazing years. Enjoy!

Still cooking...Fresh out of the oven...Two weeks old...Few weeks later with Aunt Crystal...Sleeping with daddy at two months...Late night photo shoot with mommy 3 months...First Christmas 6 months...Learning to crawl together 8 months...Playing with her mommy 10 months...First time at "the beach" 11 months...Park with cousin Caydance 14 months...First Christmas 18 months...

Thena's Birthday party 23 months...

Hanging with Grandma Bea on her big second birthday!

"To Reminisce is to remind ourselves of who we are and we we may become." May she grow strong and healthy, Live long and happy, and always have love within her and all around her.

Love you Tukker Davidia

Pictures

My little ones are getting so big! Just wanted to post some recent pics...

Doesn't she look like an angel :).

Playing on the floor together.

Credit counceling

I had a credit counceling appointment on monday and the woman counceling me was awesome and very inspirational! She is a 40 year old widow with three nearly grown children and she is a very successfull carrer woman. All three of her kids were home schooled for there entire elementry, jr.high, and high school. We got into a conversation about home schooled families and the benifits and what not. I have been interested in home school since I had Tukker but hadn't begun looking into it much yet. I just kinds figured she would start public school along with every one else because thats what you do when you turn four or five. This woman really made me concider home school with a much stronger interest. I have never been very happy with the education that I recieved in the public school and I know that some of that has to do with how much I put into it but I think it is also a common downside of the public schools. With 30 - 1 class size ratios and a strict ciriculum to stick to how much attention can each child really recieve? Children with special needs and slower learning speeds often get held back in school when they really just need some extra one on one attention. All of the information that school aged children need to learn I already know or I have easy access to. If I home school my kids I can teach them at there speed and really focus on there strengthss and work through there struggles. If I am wanting to be home with them anyway as a stay home mom why not make the decision to really get involved and do there schooling myself to. SO anyways David and I are starting to research it and look more into our options. We still have some time to really decide. What are every one elses thoughts on home school?

Ahhhh

So I started work a week and a half ago and I am already having SAHM withdrawals. I hate the dilemma that comes along with parenting. I totally have the option to stay home which means that I am leaving my babies for hours a day BY CHOICE! But when I am home I feel depressed because I am not doing much of anything and I never see and other adults! I hate making choices especially ones that actually matter like this. Having the extra income from me working will really help us pay off our student loans and save up faster and I really enjoy my job and the people I work with. On the other hand, when I am home my kids are happier and seem to sleep and eat better and my husband is happier because not only does he see me more but I also keep the house a lot cleaner when I am not working! I don't know what to do!

Some pictures!

Before hair... Plain and boring...

After hair... punk teenager/cute soccer mom/ business woman!
I added a few more for fun look at my girlies sweet smile! She loves holding her brother!

And look at THAT smilie! WHat a handsome boy I have :)

First day back!

So I began my new training class at work yesterday! It felt good to be back. I missed my babies and my man while I was there but it felt really good to be out of the house and doing some thing. Kenzie is watching the kids for now until she goes back to school and it sounds like every thing went smoothly for her first day other than a fussy baby boy. I am excited about my new position at work. It is a different department and there is a lot for me to learn but it will be less repetitive than my old position. I made a couple friends right away yesterday and I am excited to get to know them better as well! I will keep you all updated! Also I will soon post some pics of my new hair cut! woo hoo I love it. I never thought short hair would fit me but I think it does!